A morning muse

Father, when I read about prayer, as I did this morning, I always feel myself to be lacking in that area and I find myself wondering why I seem to struggle so.  I want to be a woman of prayer, who continually and persistently “inquires” of You, and yet how much of my day is just given over to “auto-pilot” or worse trying to figure it all out on my own.

The other night, in the parking lot of Wal-mart, I looked up and was overwhelmed by the beauty of the sun setting, the colors were just spectacular and I just had to stop for a moment to take it all in – a moment of such awe and wonder and worship.  But I was also struck by how people were just going about their business and didn’t seem to notice or appreciate the gift of the glory of that moment.

I think, at times, prayer is like that for me.  Here is this incredible gift of being able to enter into communion with You, at any moment, and instead I get lost in the day to day routines of life.  Father, forgive me for my not being more persistent in prayer.  Awaken in me the desire to pray and to remember just who I am and my need for Your guidance and direction in my life.  I remember once hearing it said, it’s not Your assistance I need but Your existence in my life.  You lead, and I'll follow.

Yes, I do set aside time to “be with You” but I want more of You – not moments but constantly and continually in Your presence.  Yes, Lord, let’s work on that – and thank You for the desire.