Back to reality

ABBA Father, I’m having a melt-down.  After a week away – rested yet not at rest.  I am so sorry that I let the cares of life rob me of the joy that You give.  I see it as a sin against You, because it reveals a lack of trust . . . a fearfulness that something bad will happen and “I” won’t be able to handle it . . . as if “I” can really handle anything on my own.  I feel so out of control and it scares me.  I don’t want to feel this way, but that’s all it is – a feeling.  There’s this dialog in my head – that I somehow don’t measure up – which in truth I don’t – a feeling of inadequacy . . . again, feelings.  Show me what I need to learn from this, use this to draw me closer to You, make a change in me to be more in love with You, to be more in Your will, centered and steadied in You. 

I am sorry and I am grateful, that once again -  You have come to my rescue, Your peace that passes understanding does sustain me, Your joy does fill me and Your presence is so much more than I could ever hope for – just knowing that You are near, that You are here with me, is more than enough for what ever may come my way.

You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore. (Psa. 16:11)